Prior to having children, I knew exactly how my children would be raised, exactly how they would behave in public, at the dinner table and how successful they would be because of my extensive understanding and my superior knowledge in parenting.
Once child number one arrived, I changed my tune. I no longer knew how to parent; I only knew how to care for a ‘nine month old’ or a ‘one year old’ depending on child number one’s age.
Child number two arrived and again I changed my tune. I no longer knew how to look after any age, I found out I only knew MY children and how to deal with their personality, temperment and any other factor that affects them and only them. I no longer know how you should raise your child and I know that what you are doing is what you do best for your child.
Where do you turn for your parenting guidance, discipline ideas and just good old reinforcement?
I was pleased to visit a friend of mine recently who has her mom visit with her regularly and spend time with her as she cares for her newborn. I left her home with a warm heart knowing that she has the continous love and experience of her mother to guide her through this time of continuous learning. Years of experience brings years of knowledge so learning from an admired parent is an excellent source!
For myself, my wonderful mom will not provide advice unless I ask for it. Sometimes my own pride will limit these requests for info on my part but I guess muddling through on our own terms allows us plenty of opportunity for personal realization and growth.
During my years of EXTENSIVE parenting knowledge (prior to children) I used to enjoy watching Nanny911 and Supernanny to see how the other half lived. I am now able to see how these families can become this way and the time and dedication it takes to try to maintain an organized home. Somewhere in my ‘time well wasted’ watching these shows I have managed to implement some of their training with my two year old. It isn’t always easy and when I default to easy I end up with a bigger mess.
I appreciate books, dvds and web information from Focus On The Family if you’re ever at a loss, it is a great place to turn.
We’ll all manage to make our parenting errors but we’ll be the toughest critics on ourselves so let’s cut us some slack and know we’re doing the best we can from our frame of reference!