I affectionately sat on my husband’s lap yesterday to relax as he played ‘vroom, vroom’ with our little guy at the kitchen table. These moments are rare as you are well aware since there are always plenty of other priorities on the list. As I sat there in pride watching them interact I was imagining what it meant to my son to see us together, and it made me realize how I want him to have an affectionate relationship with his wife when he grows up. Without going into every detail of how my mind processes, I came to realize that I need to take inventory of what I, as a mom represent to him each day because when he grows up he will naturally, and of course, unknowingly become attracted to many traits that his mom holds.
A loving and nurturing relationship between two adults is so beautiful and I want that for my little boys! I want them to find a lady who knows the value that God puts into a marriage, a union that makes two become one. I want their wife’s face to light up when they walk in the room. I want my sons’ wife to want the best for them, support them in their dreams and endeavors and have unwavering respect for them.
We have Your Child Video Seminar: Essentials of Discipline and Dr Dobson mentions in his own respectful manner that you can tell a child anything you would like but ultimately they will learn from your example. Dr Dobson uses the example that you can tell a child not to lie but then when the phone rings and you tell your child to say you are not available then you have just taught your child it IS okay to lie if it works in your favour. This instruction affirms that it is not ‘what you say’ but primarily ‘your example’.
Every action we make creates our child’s “normal” from our daily routines to how we interact and treat others; this is how we establish their values, behaviours and eventual lifestyle. Wow, what a responsibility! I need to be the best I can be in front of my children!? That sounds like a challenge in itself. The greatest values I would like to give my children is commitment and discipline. I pray that I (with God’s help) will be able instill these values in my boys.
I appreciate that both daddy and I communicate almost daily with our parents so, (wink, wink) perhaps they will think it is only normal to speak to us daily when they grow up. Daddy’s brother just moved to the same town so we’ll have to work on building that relationship too so our little boys know that they will need to be each other’s friend when they grow up too.
Of course, we don’t have the ultimate control of how our child will turn out but establishing a healthy home life is always a good start. Now, time to go. I better get at it!
Photo Courtesy freedigitalphotos.net
Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn’t have anything to do with it. ~Haim Ginott